Sue McKay is a thief...

But not really...


While writing an exam the other day I felt a sneeze coming on. I deformed my face as one does during the initial stages of a sneeze, and braced myself. Like I said, I was writing an exam, so I attempted to keep my sneeze as quiet as possible so as not to completely disturb my classmates. I reared my head back slightly, and it snapped forward as the contents of my lungs (should have) expunged itself. Something strange happened though and, as far as I can remember and I think one would have a good memory of this, my sneeze actually turned into a small cough at the last second. I sat there with, I'm sure, a puzzled look on my face. Had anyone been looking at me, I'm sure it would've been a strange thing to see. Screwed up face, rearing back of cranium, violent snap forward, small cough. I had lost my sneeze. I looked on the ground (actually did that) and it wasn't there. It wasn't on my desk. Dammit! Where was my damn sneeze. The next 27 hours passed and the damn thing didn't turn up. It felt kinda like I had just lost my debit card in the house, and I KNEW it was in the house, but no matter how hard I looked I couldn't come across it.

A couple friends came over the next day and as we were sitting around chatting my friend, Sue, suddenly, out of complete no where, sneezed! She immediately seemed surprised as there was no warning of a sneeze for her. She was laughing and then BOOM!! SNEEZE!!! I immediately looked up at her, as I recognized the complete and utter shock on her face, knowing full well that sneeze was not expected! "YOU FOUND MY SNEEZE! THERE IT IS!!" Odd thing to hear after you sneeze as Bless You is probably the more appropriate response, but once I explained it I felt much better. I had found my sneeze. It was in Sue! That was the last place I would've thought to look. Well... maybe not the last place. Perhaps in someone I've never met before, someone like the Pope, yeah, that would've been the last place. Anyways, I feel good now. Honestly, as soon as I recognized that look on her face it might as well have been me that sneezed. I even wiped my nose.

MORAL: Lose your sneeze? Check your friends. They can be thieves too.